9/16/02
Sunset at Tourist Park
All right, I was trying to read Ecological Literacy but I just couldn't concentrate. It's not a big deal because I have all of tomorrow to finish the assignment.
I have a lot to think about. I'm sitting here on the rocks at Tourist Park, looking out over the lake. The sun is shining onto me from the front, casting a golden glow that speaks of evening coming on. The water is completely flat, as if the wind had already called it a day. Not surprising, as he had an early morning blowing us off the lake at 8:00 after only an hour of rowing.
(omitted - ca. 75 words)
Part of me wonders if we shouldn't even keep our eyes open for possible relationships - the strongest, most long-lasting ones seem to be the one that sneak up on us unawares. But maybe this is my chance to do it right - to avoid the mistakes I made before. To spend a long time building a mutual love and respect before a single article of clothing hits the floor. Or the fan. Or whatever.
(omitted)
...I've been trying to curb my sexual passions in favor of other pursuits (ha, ha, shut up). Like the skills I learned at the Tracker school. That path draws me much more than the frivolous, meaningless path of college romance. But still...there is something inside all of us, even those of us who seek knowledge of the worlds beyond the flesh, that reaches out for companionship. While I don't want to spend any energy trying to fulfill that longing, it will not be silent and always, I seem to have one eye on the creator and one eye on ...guys. I am often quite exasperated with myself. But is is romance it asks for, or just a kindred spirit? I don't know. There's so many things I don't understand.
The sun is slipping behind the trees now. It was very sudden. My side of the lake is now in shadow, but the other shore is still bathed in gold. The leaves on one lone tree are starting to turn red. Fall is coming! I don't have a favorite season. I love whichever one I'm in, but toward the end, the excitement of moving on begins to build. A whole new season, with a new array of beauties and wonders. One lifetime will hardly be enough to discover it all! And so I will not spend my days stagnating in an office building. I will bring people OUT of the office, and show them this beauty.
Once the sun touched the trees, he slid under so quickly that the moment almost passed me by. Now that he is gone, the shy moon has risen up over the opposite horizon. The air is already much cooler. By tomorrow morning, it will be as cold as it was this morning - and my day will begin in much the same way. But it will be a brand new day, and thus have a magic all its own. Today will soon be a memory.
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